MONSTER ATTACK

Tired

2011-09-04T22:22:00.001+08:00

Prelims are just round the corner and I honestly haven't really started doing much. I really need to get myself pumped up and ready to er.. study?

On a lighter note, it's the mid autumn festival or as I would like to call it "mooncake festival" HAHA. Just bought 5hugeass boxes of mooncakes including some delish snowskin durian and snowskin choco ones. Mmm. I feel my waistline expanding already!

Oh right, sharon's wedding is just round the corner and ive not bought my dress yet or got my hair done TSKTSK SO LITTLE TIME SO MUCH TO DO! Plus ive been feeling really shagged and weary and i'm feeling so guilty all the time. Dear Lord please give me some much needed confidence and extend your grace to me and my friends. We really need it.

I need to believe. I need to.

ADELE/GAGA MASHUP (rolling in the deep/someone like you/ hair/ edge of g...

2011-08-27T22:53:00.000+08:00

just thought that this place needed a little updating. This was last july when we (jammy beans) won viva la music 2011! quite a memorable night i must say. The jammy beans girls are AWESOME.

Update!

2011-06-19T15:52:00.001+08:00

So i see I've been neglecting this space far too long. I really want to write loads of stuff but I have this niggling feeling that this blog is closely watched. Hmm. Shan't let the inner worry wart take over me.

So I've been trying my best to study very hard and ace my subjects and so far I still see no vast improvements or any sort of sign that things are turning out for the better. I've got to do rather well for my MYEs if not the school might send me a letter to ask me to redo J2 which is like HELL TO THE NO. Two years of JC is bad enough, you want me to do another year?! So I'm gonna try my best to get at least average of all Cs for my MYEs and at least rank points of 55 and above.

Anyway I'll update this place more regularly instead of my tumblr which I do love very much. FYI tumblr address can be obtained via me! :)

Ciao.

Nerdygirl93 signing off till the next available free time ie- after the dreaded As.

2011-01-23T16:37:00.000+08:00

2011-01-13T17:01:00.000+08:00

just a little song.

I'll get lost, messed up and bored when I'm alone too long
I can't sleep, function or eat when I'm not with someone
Late last fall, he ended it all and moved to who-knows-where
Just like that, he vanished and packed and never even called

You feel a certain sense of synergy between yourself and me
A kind of macabre and somber Wonder-twin kind of harmony
What if it was you?
You that I needed all along
I felt like a fool,
Kicking and screaming and pretending we were wrong

Let's get wrecked on pop tarts and sex and see the Taj Mahal
Let's save birds from Prince William Sound and skateboard through the mall
Let's fight crime with mangoes and limes and join the PGA
Let's win big with every spin but hurry, I can't wait

Do you spend a fortune on those late-night prepaid television scams
In search of the perfect blend of steak knife and non-stick frying pan?
What if it was you?
You that I needed all along
I felt like a fool
Thinking we were completely wrong
It seemed like a dream
A beautiful screen
That echoed forever
And made us not afraid to feel a thing

And after it ends
We'll try to be friends
They say that what doesn't kill us makes us who we are

All this time and everything's changed but I still feel the same
All good things eventually end and get washed down the drain
What a disaster it would be if you discovered that I cared
A little too much for friends but not enough to share

What if it was you?
You that I needed all along
I felt like a fool
Now that I'm sure that I was wrong
It had to be you.
It had to be you.
It had to be you.
I knew it was you.

sighnomore

2011-01-08T19:37:00.000+08:00

“Sometimes God doesn’t change your situation because He is trying to change your heart.”

c?

2011-01-08T11:32:00.002+08:00

the pressure to conform is intense.
Anyway heading to school now for some open house practice or something. Which involves some really embarrassing dance steps (for me at least). I will be wielding a stick with a ball attached to it and picture it in your head: aby with some sort of dragon dance look alike equipment doing soccer tricks with it.
AND THE BLOODY TEACHER KEEPS STRESSING THAT I'M THE KEY TO THE PERFORMANCE WHICH WILL ATTRACT PEOPLE AND MAKE THEM STAY.
which roughly translates into: you are the joke. the butt of the joke. and you need to embarrass yourself for the good of the school. MAY I DOUBLE UNDERLINE: EMBARRASS.

i really wanna find a hole and hide in it.

so much has changed since 2010-2011

2011-01-05T09:17:00.005+08:00

so much has changed since 2010-2011

jan:

feb:

march:

april:

may:

june:

:

july:

aug:

sept:

oct:

nov:
:

dec:

i'm usually not a narcissist but i just wanted to see how much i've changed over a span of 12 months. shocking.

reflections 2010

2011-01-04T21:34:00.001+08:00

Well this entire year wasn't that smooth sailing as i thought but at the same time not that tough either. It was a rather mixed up year where the ups were fantastically great and the lows were terrible. But 2010 on a whole made me a whole lot tougher, a heck lot more mellow and humble, taught me how to let people go and say goodbye. And maybe a tad bit smarter, fatter but on the whole, wiser. So lets start off month by month! HIGHLIGHTS/ LOWLIGHTS HAHA

Jan: was the perfect month of how good God's mercy is and how he knows what is the best for me. For example my O level results! I was expecting a whole load of C's or B's for my math as ive been failing them throughout the whole academic course and God was good and I GOT A BLOODY A2 AND A C5 FOR TWO MATH SUBJECTS. IT WAS AHMAZING. And my results overall was decently good. Well at least good enough to secure me a place in a decent college. AND THE MS WORRYWART STRIKES AGAIN. I was so afraid that i couldn't get into the college i wanted as my scores were exactly just nice to get in. And it being a rather popular college i was freaking out because i thought i wouldn't get in at all! But then i prayed and left it in His hands and said: God you know what's best. You know what is the path I'm destined for. So give me faith to trust in you once more. And so i did! When the posting results came, i was like OMG. I got in! And apparently some of my friends who got the same score as me applied didnt get in! Which led me to thank God for his goodness. Oh another thing was my subject combination. I wanted to do geography, math, economics and chemistry which was quite a rare combination and i again freaked out at being not able to get it. But then God spoke to me through a verse that went something like: leave all your worries to Him and he will guide your path or something. And with that i applied and TADA I GOT IT AGAIN! That was truly a wonderful month of God's goodness.

feb: was a month of getting used to stuff. the month of getting used to JC and homesickness (from beatty) and also a month of getting used to having someone not being in your life. Where I fell out with a friend and I don't think we really got back on to the same track after that. Was a rather dark period i'd say. then after that everything went downhill from feb onwards.

march: saddest month in the entire year no doubt about it. Someone who i've always took for granted and hated (well kinda in an endearing way) killed himself. I can remember what I felt and the anger when I heard the news. I was like "WHY? DIDN'T YOU ALWAYS TELL US TO TREASURE LIFE?!" then i broke down. Sobbing along the corridors of my new school and tears spilling everywhere. Being all choked up when I called my friends to tell them about the awful news. here was what i wrote then: "

remember the times when we laughed at your pronunciations like : dont put birds in my mouth, gozzip, parareall, gwadient and i remember you couldnt pronounce my name for nuts and you called me " ahbeegayle" also remember you were so pissed when i drew you as a fat ugly potato man? and also how you'll always secretly smile when the beavers were behaving all weirdly; like rollercoasting in class, sleeping till we drool, sneaking food in. miss those times with you.
oh remember when we were all in cahoots with you to play a prank on candies? and i remember when i drew stuff on the white board only to realise you were behind me all along and you said: wow, you are quite talented in art! you should do a career on it. it was by far the nicest thing youve said to me. and remember when you gave me a smelly tissue when i was crying cos i failed my amath 3 times in a row? and remember our buffet party? where you thought we all went crazy when we danced like madwomen? and then you gave me a life home on your new car and i kinda dented the car door by accident? and remember our goals in life card? you walked past and read it, with a pleased look and you said: wah! when you become a vet/pilot and earn lots of money must remember mr ng hor!
i'll keep my word potato man. wish you were here.

i will remember you, will you remember me?
dont let your life, pass you by.
weep not for the memories."

through this incident, i learned to say goodbye, learned how to cry with no refrains, learned never to take anyone for granted and love everyone everyday. I became stronger i guess.

april: flunked a whole load of test in college and was rather down for a good few days. well at least for that month i was cleared from injury leave and I got gold for my fitness test! WOOHOO. AND THE BEST BIT: I GOT SELECTED FOR THE NEW YORK FIELD TRIP!! 36selected students out of 200! That really made my month. Mad rush to submit my PI and i almost missed the deadline and so that month was one to thank God for.

may: had my first mid year examination paper- general paper! which apparently went horribly. May was a rather quiet month with not much happenings nut it was like the calm before the storm.

june: HAD THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME IN NEWYORK WITH A BUNCH OF AWESOME PEOPLE. Made some friends that i really really loved and i could have loads of fun with. But then the trip ate up two weeks of my study time and my major exams were just round the corner and i had barely 2 weeks of study. Because i had to recover from my jetlag and holiday mood. It was a month of struggle as i cooped myself at home, studied like crazy, fell sick and still studied away. I prayed everyday to God for strength to get through that crazy period.i've learnt to always ask God for strength and it really does help!

july: flunked my mid years quite badly. But i passed overall. ok not really, i SCRAPED through. My results came back as a shock to me and something inside me clicked. The inner mugger mode is back. results were:gp-e, Chinese,math,chem-U economics-E and geog-d. but despite all the horrible results and the apparent lack of preparation for exams, i somehow miraculously scraped through everything. All thanks to God seriously. No joke. Quarreled with my sister quite badly

August: breakup season for all my friends. 5 breakups in a week is too much to handle. I sort of became a mediator/ confidant/ love guru. Which kinda made me a little distracted from studies and stuff. taught me a lot. Like how to properly comfort people which I'm horrible in. Taught me to love and cherish everyone and love does not change. it's the people who changes.

September: the entire month was spent on mugging and completing my revision. You know, i have this really bad character trait. That is worrying. Despite repeated assurances and even i know it myself that i'm well prepared, i'll still worry. I'll panic and annoy everyone with what if i fail what if i fail?! But this month something changed. Yes i did worrry but everytime I worried, i counter attacked it with a verse and kept telling myself trust in the Lord. Do not fear. Don't trust your own understanding but believe in Him. He will make things right afterall he put you here for a reason and not to harm you. And what ever hardships you go through is for your growth and to trust in him and to grow in spirit. And with that, I stepped into the battle field head on.

October: exams! I went in sat for the papers and went away feeling very depressed and upset as it was rather tough but i still refused to give up and prayed and went back to battle. Felt like it was the end of the world but amazingly, results came back and it was a shocker. i did pretty well in fact! the result of trusting all that i had into His hands! and so, GP: i got a C, math i got a D, chinese i got a D!! got a C for math got another C for econs and I GOT A B FOR GEOG!

Nov: a very very harrowing month of deadlines and submissions which meant that my sleep was compromised, health, God time basically everything was compromised. And i still remember that I had a full report of 3000 words to be handed in for final submission at 10am the next day and at the day before at around 8pm i was still rushing and re-editing the parts. I nearly yanked out all of my hair. Slept at 3am that day and rushed to school at 7am and started editing again. it was hell. but thank God after rounds of editing and print errors, we finally submitted the report and thank GOD ALL WAS WELL.

Then there was the oral presentation for the project. Which went smoothly with minimal hitch all thanks to God again.

Dec: whole lot of things happened. There was church youth camp where i was in the camp committee and i was in charge of games and food and bunks which was a whole load of responsibility. I was a tad bit unsure about it at first and i really doubted my own capabilities. Until i read joshua and he kinda inspired me to see how God can use you and at the same time learn the traits of being a good leader and stuff. Conference went G-R-E-A-T. It spoke to me on a lot of levels especially about God using you and how he uses imperfect people to do be part of his perfect plan. Like i've always seen myself as someone who is horribly flawed. I always feel inadequate in so many areas where other people always seem so much better, more talented, more beautiful and etc. you get my drift. maybe i'm rather conscious of my own self image so when ever i hear altar calls, something inside me always stirs. As if a little voice is nudging me and urging me to take that step of faith and to go out there and put my pride, image, ego on the line and to humble myself again. I could never bring myself to do it. But this time round, the speaker called for two altar calls and the first one was just overwhelming where this guy standing in front of me cried and i had this strange sensation on my feet and my toes were twitching on their own as if yelling just walk to the front you idiot! but i couldn't so i suppressed the feeling. As the speaker started saying there are some of you out there wanting the Lord to work in your life and to renew your spirit come forward. Then something inside me clicked. I literally heard the light switch turning on. Something told me to put down that silly pride and image, does it even matter? Does it compare to the wonderful things that you will receive and promised if you step out there? Then i stepped out. Where my youth pastor prayed for me and i could feel myself shaking and i wanted to weep and cry for as if a heavy load was lifted off me. I finally felt.. assured. Contented. I don't know how to describe that feeling but it was.. amazing. So december was truly a good month that helped to end the year on a good note.

Yes as bad as 2010 was December helped to lift it up. All thanks to God.

you may wonder why do i keep talking about God but he is truly awesome and he is amazing and idk no words can ever define HIM! I can go on forever. I feel like i can keep talking about him non stop.

2011 is a year full of challenges and pit holes but with Him by my side, i can do all things.

Studying!

2011-01-04T14:29:00.001+08:00

Omg. Was just studying in school and i can't remember a single thing about chemistry. What on earth is thermal stability?!

Geog too: WHAT IS HORTONS RULE?!

Math: hah at least i still know most of it

Econs: uhhh what is inflation again?

Gp: yucks don't even wanna go there

Chinese: what is chinese

Abigail you are in deep trouble.

2011-01-04T09:55:00.001+08:00

My hearts wants to go one way
My mind don't agree
Cause they,
They have fallen out recently

2010-11-29T15:39:00.003+08:00

the world should know about regina spektor and mumford and sons and noah and the whale and laura marling and ingrid michealson and indie folk music in general. here are some of my favs

regina spektor: samson, folding chair, eet, fidelity and so much more
mumford and sons: liar,sister,little lion man, winter winds, timshel, dustbowl dance and zillions more
noah and the whale: blue skies, five years time, shape of my heart, mary and more.
laura marling: new romantic, rambling man, england, ghosts, alas i cannot swim and MOREEE
ingrid michealson: men of snow, maybe, soldier, the chain, giving up, glass and omg soooo much more!

currently watching this:

pals

2010-11-15T12:47:00.000+08:00

30 day challenge day4!

well.. I don’t really know hot to go about writting this but..

CLOSEST FRIENDS ( ihave sooo many! ain’t i lucky?) as of now.

*in alphabetical order:

AGNES SUSTRISNO: I’VE NOT FORGOTTEN YOU EVEN YOU ARE LIKE A ZILLION MILES AWAY FROM ME. You are the first friend I made in Beatty and I’ve come to love your amazing presence. She is the only one whom I can chat on the phone for HOURS on end. The one I could talk to when I have problems and all. The only person who liked me for who I was even though there was the dark period in my sec 1-2 life. The only friend who truly believed what I said then. PLEASE COME BACK SOON AND LETS GO FOR OUR TRADITIONAL SUSHI AND ICE CREAM PLEASE. <3 I’VE TONS TO SHARE.

AMANDA YU: SHE IS DA MOST ENCOURAGING GIRL/ DELIGHTFUL GIRLY EVER. The first person I’ll run to if I’ve got a really lame blonde joke to tell. No matter how lame or moron-ic my jokes are, she’ll always laugh and it boosts my self confidence by a million times! Also if I’ve got any problems ie: me failing AMATH repeatedly she’ll always encourage me and say with a smile: YOU CAN DO IT! and it gives me the faith and also with her sitting behind me during almost all exams, I can suck her brainy aura and TADA i can do well for exams :)) <3 YOU GIRL. What would I do without you? MEET UP SOON YO.

BRENDA NG: THE STRONG BEAVER! WHERE ARE YOU! I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU IN AGES WOMAN! She was the second friend I made in beatty and I’ll NEVER EVER FORGET HOW SHE INTRODUCED HERSELF TO ME “hii, I’m brenda! But you guys can call me BLADDER” OMG. i liked her instantly. I like people who are different and have the guts. She is one awesome girl because her constant jokes make me laugh like crazy ( hey even jokers need jokes ok!), her strong support and her I DON’T GIVE A DAMN ATTITUDE helped me through alot. I bet you didn’t realise right bren? Especially during the J incident. <3

CANDIES SUTANTO: MY LOVELY CRAZY BEAVER WHO RESEMBLES A SOFT FLUFFY MARSHMALLOW. SHE WAS THE ONE WHO GAVE ME COURAGE AND GUTS TO STAND UP TO J and her army. She gives really good advice and she is the LURVE GURU. Yes she was one of the few who taught me how to hug properly and the joys of sleeping in class, helped me with my chem and hehe now I’m helping you with chem! She almost made me cry when she left for aussie. That party night was one of the best ever! She is a really one of a kind girl. Remember how we both banged into the pole during sec 3 camp? She is also one of the few who ran with me down to canteen to beat the 5n crowd. And how you keep setting off alarms due to the tag in your bra? <3 There are so much more!

CHERIE YEO: SURPRISED TO SEE YOUR NAME HERE?! HAHA IT’S BEEN AN AWESOME YEAR GETTING TO KNOW YOU. All our random crappings before /during/after lectures, going through torture ie fhil’s 12minute runs, CHIONGING TO THE CANTEEN, gossiping and BUFFETS! She is one awesome girl. She doesn’t care what people think of her and she just does things. I think her personal motto is JUST DO IT or something. In a way, it kinda taught me how not to be too inhibited and cowardly. She makes me laugh in the midst of depressing school life and the really hard backslaps are training me for the future and it makes me tougher LOL! She also introduced me to the good bargains and the HOLY GODLIKE MILO. Awesome company if you wanna shop. <3

CHERYL HOW: AKA THE EVIL LITTLE ONE. Don’t belittle her tiny stature and sweet looks. SHE IS TOTALLY THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU SEE. Inside her lurks evil. HAHA. I’ve got to know her much better (too much i think) during our period of hell together aka PW and SHE IS A FIRM BELIEVER OF MY GUT FEEL. She is one of the most superstitious person I’ve ever met. But in a good way. She kinda taught me and brought me onto the path of self discovery thanks to her constant and relentless probings of my secrets. She is one of the few people who I can actually tease and get away with it. First person in school to make me yell in anger. Thanks COW, and we must get A for PW OK! <3

DARIUS LEONG: ELLO! He was the first friend I made in class! Being yiying’s past scandal, HAHA i teased him till no end. He makes me laugh and to also sometimes see things on another side and from a different point of view. Helps me in my useless chemistry and teaches me math! We have zillions of inside jokes like the ms J’s geomagnetic reversals. He is also my starbucks buddy and you still owe me one more green tea cream mister! Encourages me shop LOL. But he too believes that i can do things and that is very nice :) and my mugger motivation.

DIONE SEAH: THE SCATTER BRAIN TURNED INTO A LADY! OMG! Oh man, I miss this person like crazy. My life was never the same the day she and candies say behind me. Life became.. WONDERFUL HAHA. She taught me how to hug properly, she is quite good to talk to if you’ve got problems and she is the current reigning champion of roll yourself to the canteen award. SHE IS ONE OF A KIND. You will never ever meet anyone like her. Obsessed with getting abs and a good figure even though she already has one. She invents ways to get around everyday problems such as aching legs due to too much crossing of them so she came up with the solution of tying your shoelace to the grills under the table. Miss you and hurry beaver day come! <3

DAN YOUNG: I haven’t seen you for almost a year already! He is the only person who can make me laugh till i really truly cried and almost pee in my pants. Please stop using skype to torture me ok? HAHA. HURRY COME BACK SOON SO WE CAN GO HUNT FOR NICE TASTY INDIAN FOOD IN CHINA TOWN. HAHAHA

LYDIA AND NAOMI: me awesome churchies. They are the most delightful girls one can meet and fellowship with in church. I’ve known them for like forever. @naomi: remember how we used to play silly stuff like GWA team and hunt for pigeons? I still love those good old days and I’ll do anything to go back and relive those care free days. Naomi is one of a kind as well. You’ll never meet anyone as innocent and funny like her. Lydia has this aura about her that you’ll feel like you are her good pal.

MELISSA TAN: The sleepy beaver. Most of the time she is inactive, a nocturnal creature i must say. HEHE. She is also another one of kind person you’ll ever meet. No one sneezes as loudly as her, blows her nose honkier than her or sing as AHMAZING as her. She encourages me both as a friend and as well as a sister in christ. So many times when I’m so dry and weary all she does is just say, pray and trust God and IDK why but I’ll instantly feel much better and refreshed. She is also a firm believer of me and my abilities and no matter how i tear myself down, she’ll be there believing i can do it. Not to mention she taught me how to hug and the joys of eating tomyum noodles with oodles of chilli. I was quite scared that I’ll end up alone in NY but thankfully she was there and it made life a little easier knowing that there is a familiar face i can turn to. THANKSMELO. <3

MINJUN: follower look alike girl. ajisen look alike girl. Though she is quite temperamental, she can really be a laugh and fun to be with. She helps me out in geog and keeps probing me for my secrets. I think I kinda knew myself better this year thanks to her. Oh and she eats super slowly and by the time I’m done, she hasnt even started!it’s been awesome getting to know ya and hang! She is also my daily story teller. That woman is full of stories. :D

SEE SHUTING: AKA SHOOTING. HAHA. My weird roomie in newyork and my closest friend in JC! I secretly find it very funny when she says: I like you aby, as a friend. It’s very shooting. And though i don’t really show it but it really makes my day! She is SUPER DUPER encouraging and she knows one of deepest darkest secret which i accidentally blurted out during my sleep talk. She is very very funny due to her auntie-ness and her lame jokes makes my day! I think after getting to know her, I’ve become a much more cheery person and it’s really funny to hear her talk about her grandma and her family. And i think she is the only jc person who knows me the best aka my sleeping habits, what i like to eat, how indecisive i am and etc. She also reminds me constantly to study and not fool around. <3

SERA CHENG: aka blondie. She is the cutest person you’ll ever meet. She’s really a blonde like person. you know what i mean. She too gives me oodles and moodles of encouragement and she is just this huge fun bubble and it’s guaranteed that yo’ll have a good time with her around. We also bald periodically and we are both turning blondes :( HAHA. She is my sister in christ and man she taught me stuff and how to trust God in our darkest times. She’s also the first person who congratulated me on my O’s results! I bet she’ll never forget how I reacted when I heard i passed my Amath. <3 MEET UP YO. I WANNA CRASH SP.

SHOW YIYING: THE AUNTIE IN MY LIFE. aka naruto! man, she’s the person who got me all addicted to anime and fish soup. She is my table partner for about 2 years and i don’t know what i’ll do without her. literally. Without her i won’t know what’s going on in school, don’t know when are we having tests, don’t know what homework there are, or when the new naruto episodes are out! She is by far the most responsible and epic friend I’ve ever had. she is like my motherly figure HAHAHA she’ll kill me if she sees this. She helped me countless of times in math and chem and without her i would have gotten the results i’ve had. Thanks ah ma! <3

VALERIE QUEK HUEIMIN: aka my isomer! I think she is the person whom I can click the best with. Call it weird or what ever, but we are eerily similar in certain aspects hence the name ISOMER! same molecular formula but different structural formulas. We can read each other’s minds sometimes and we have allergies yo! She is really amazing and funny. Another one of a kind. She is flexible and spontaneous which suits me fine as I like that too! We have a secret link aka AHEM chatbot fake identity (inside joke) i really hope we never get found out! She totally stuck up for me during the J thingy and offered me valuable advices and sneaky plots and like what mel says, min hugs well. HAAHA, She dragged me to watch my first ever twilight movie and my first nc16 show which was full of adult humour that i didnt get. She introduced me to billy bombers and the land of fats. They are the reason why i’ve been gaining weight. She tried to psycho me how awesome FMS people are and I’m just plain mean to be stereotyping them. HAHA but i can’t get rid of it! THANKS FOR TELLING THE WORLD IMA BIMBO. <3

101

2010-10-17T15:12:00.002+08:00

ok.. my aunt just asked me how’s life in college and abruptly ask whether I’m attached!

It took me by surprise and i spat out my water and got all my notes wet. So while choking on my water, she started rambling on the advantages of having one. Reminds me of how yesterday at night safari i met my tutor and his ahem, girlfriend. I HONESTLY DIDNT MEAN TO INTERRUPT ANYTHING. So sorry if i broke your kissy moment! FORGIVE ME. Sigh, why do i always go around interrupting people when they are doing something important like assuring their girlfriends that the ghosts aren’t scary. I embarrassed myself ttm.

ANYWAY, yesterday was a blast! Sitting the scary tram rides and etc. THANKS SERA,AMANDA,KAIRONG FOR THE AWESOME COMPANY! never mind that i was scared sheetless, but i had fun honestly. especially laughing at sera and her ghost phobia teehee.

ADIOS. FOR NOW. SCHOOL IS STARTING :((

To you my darling

2010-09-30T10:50:00.001+08:00

To my dear friend who is under going some sort of identity crisis,

You don't have to be perfect to know that you are perfect. We all love you for the way you are. so don't go comparing yourself with others because in the end, you are only gonna be a second class version of somebody else. Why not be who you really are and that's when you'll know what it means to be truly special.

2010-09-26T22:54:00.000+08:00

HI ALL!
DO CHECK OUT MY ALTER EGO
: fishynibbles.tumblr.com

I POST MUCH MORE OFTEN THERE THAN ON BLOGGER. but blogger you will still remain as my favourite. sentiments sake of course.

GOGO REBLOG SOME PICS AND GIVE SOME LOVE.

God i need you.

2010-09-16T22:03:00.002+08:00

I need to learn to have more faith.
God, I'll put my trust in you. I will have faith that whatever path you put me on, I will follow.
How promos turn out be it good or bad I will still give thanks. What promos is IS NOTHING compared to what you have done and suffered.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding proverbs 3: 5

like dynamite

2010-09-11T21:19:00.002+08:00

my favourite song currently. its a cover of dynamite originally by taio cruz covered by MCFLY

creepy much?

2010-09-04T21:38:00.002+08:00

watched R.E yesterday and i think i like apocalyptic shows. yes, morbid but ITS SO FREAKIN AWESOME.
where random zombies and the walking undead with awesome makeup pop up everywhere. and with the lead actor (usually a really hot person) wield their ever razor sharp sabers and bulky/futuristic/ rugged looking machine guns and POW BAM WHAM SLASH PIEW BOOM the zombie dies with the lead actor covered in grime and zombie blood standing victorious.
what i like about these sort of kill-as-many-zombies-as-you-can shows is that there is never a cliche moment where the lead smooches another hot looking actor/actress. they are too busy surviving and killing as many undead zombies and where there are better things to do than making out. i don't like cliches. So if i were to watch a sappy, sad, romantic, weepy movie with you, i'll prolly yawn and snore through all those cliche cheesy parts. me + corny + cheesy don't mix. but on the other hand, CORN + CHEESE + ME= A LOVELY LUNCH MEAL. ok, i've just realised it sounds like i'm part of the meal like you know.. i'm THE meal. oh whatever.
PROMOS ARE FAST APPROACHING AND I CAN SEE THE HEADLIGHTS ON THE SPEEDING TRAIN CALLED PROMOS. whether or not it hits or run me over it doesnt matter. so long as i don't die.
Have you heard of anyone who survived after being hit by a train going at 200m/hour?

Hiatus

2010-09-03T20:32:00.001+08:00

HOLA FELLOW HUMAN BEANS.

BECAUSE IM ABOUT TO HEADOUT INTO THE WARZONE IN THE NEXT MONTH OR SO, THIS BLOG WILL BE ON HIATUS. BUT NO WORRIES, I'LL STILL POST SOMETHING NOW AND THEN BUT NO REGULARLY THATS ALL. AND I'LL BE BACK ON 12TH OCTOBER. SO KEEP YOUR ALIEN EYES PEELED AND FUNNEL SHAPED EARS OPEN FOR UPDATES.

Yes, im going to war. An exam war. Where blood will be spilled and people shot along the way. I kid you not.

Happiness is just a matter of perspective

2010-09-02T14:34:00.001+08:00

Teachers day was fun and nostalgic. Period.

I'll do anything to go back to those days. Those lovely carefree days and where we were only troubled by long queues in the canteen and the occassional nasty teacher. But those days are gone. Gone.

Anyway! MET UP WITH ZE LOVELIES AND HAD A FROLICKING GOOD TIME. Tried to push all my undone revision worries to the back of brain. It was such a horrid thing. You know when you wanna enjoy yourself, but this weird nagging worry keeps resurfacing and it bugs me to no end. So we skipped around, bowled, joked, gossipped and caught up with each other. i kinda wished the day would never end. But then reality soon catches up and we had to go our ways. SEE YOU SOON ME LOVELIES.

worn me down to my knees.

2010-08-28T10:39:00.004+08:00

my life as a JC kid so far is.. BORING DULL in school work sense.
revision after revision tutorials after tutorials. SIGH.
thank God for my JC friends who are there to break the monotony
introducing my "FAMILY" of 1016!
(the only decent shot!)
[ from left top: CHERIE YEO LIWEN, SEESHOOTING, CHERYL HOW, MARCUS WU,
from left bottom: VIVIEN, JUNHOE, ME! AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST CHERYL LEE]

yes we are a very loving family ;)

my hang gang,

the mad family killing me (the supposed adulteress )

the very nice and wonderful SANE family. :)

Scary much?

2010-08-22T19:56:00.001+08:00

I hope things turn out for the better.

ANYWAY. HOW WERE THE WEEKENDS FOR YOU READER? Bet yours wasnt all wasted on studying like mine. Weekends are for playing and relaxing, not cramming your brain with geog and globalisation notes and whatsoever. Sigh. Ive been sighing so much lately that im like hyperventilating all the time.

CHEM SPA TMR D: PRAY FOR ME

Have you ever had this weird queer inclination to wear something? And then realise that one of your friend ended up wearing the same thing aswell? Me and this other friend keep having strange encounters like this. We ended up wearing the same shirt on the same day with no prior planning! And we were actually at the same place but we didnt see each other. We wore the same coloured socks to school, we ate the same thing during lunch break without realising. *Shivers* its too coincidental!

My theory is that i can read minds and hover at others brain frequency. :)

I wish.

Epl

2010-08-20T08:13:00.001+08:00

I want to watch epl really badly. But then promos is ruining all my plans.

Had the MOST delightful lunch with sera and amanda! :))))))))

Talked nonsense and etc and being generally mad.

Promos in 45days.

Todo: geog rev (global)

Revise chem spa

Do hw and study econs cs.

2010-08-17T22:15:00.001+08:00

fuel of life. taken by me with a canon eos 550d

Micheal jackson

2010-08-17T15:15:00.001+08:00

I've had it with your opinions. It's seriously pissing me off.

I have my own rights of choosing my friends and if you dont like it and get jealous, then too bad. So what if i place other friends above you? Just because i spent about X years with you doesnt automatically make you higher 'ranking' than other friends whom ive know for lets say only 3months.

Seriously, stop nit picking on other people's flaws and start looking at yourself. You think you are so high and mighty, flawless, pretty, intelligent but as a pal, i'm telling you, your character just 'outshines' all of them.

And i dont want other people to talk behind your back.

Argh. I'm pmsy today. :(

Well on the brightside, MEETING CHENG CHENG TMR AT CC. HOMG EGGCITED TTM.

Exams? I call them hell

2010-08-17T09:23:00.001+08:00

I cant function well during exams. I'm pretty sure i know my stuff but somehow during the exam, all the trigonometry, statistics etc all just somehow disappear. Poof. Just like that. And i've been struggling with it for my ENTIRE life. Its pathetic i know. Please tell me i'm not the only freak?

to do aby

2010-08-16T21:36:00.001+08:00

TO DO LIST FOR THE EVER PROCRASTINATING WOMAN. aka me.
1) finish up chem revision by this week
2) finish geog physical revision
3) do geog practice papers. and let ms j mark
4) comfort my heartbroken friends (!!!!)
5) do pw editing and eom 3 if possible.

Fallen out of love

2010-08-16T15:19:00.001+08:00

5 people i know broke up in this week alone.

:( its either the weather or the valentines day vibes are wearing off and love has all but disappreared.

What ever happened to " you are the only one i love". To all my heartbroken friends, cherish the next one that comes along .

Take your time to heal. Scars WILL fade.

we have falllen down again tonight,

In this world it's hard to get it right.

Trying to make your heart fit like a glove,

Oh when all it needs is love

Everybody wants to love

Everybody wants to be loved

Happy is the heart that still feels pain

Darkness flees and light will come again

Swing open your chest and let it in

Oh just let the love begin.

Kicking off is the hardest part,

Nothing's certain at the start

Letting go, so something can begin

Blue skies

2010-08-16T15:02:00.001+08:00

This is a song for anyone

Who cant get out of bed

This is a song for anyone

with a broken heart.

You'll do anything to be happy.

But blue skies are calling

And i know that its hard

And i'll do anything to be happy.

Another has fallen

2010-08-15T10:44:00.001+08:00

Another one has fallen and reached soilid ground.

Sigh. Cheer up buddy. You'll find someone better.

Whats up with everyone nowadays. I believe its the water. Its making everyone fall out of love/ friendships. Tsk.

400th post

2010-08-14T15:19:00.005+08:00

400th post! so to celebrate here some pictures to celebrate!

i have more pictures with you than with my girlfirend

2010-08-14T00:11:00.001+08:00

no i do not want your boyfriend.

Big girls dont cry do they?

2010-08-13T11:39:00.001+08:00

If i look to my right will i see the one to fight for?

Or if i turn to my left will i see the reason to keep my heart locked up so tight?

Not alone

2010-08-13T08:29:00.001+08:00

Please tell me i'm not the only one feeling this weird heaviness.

It's either due to me not sticking to my revision schedule or it could be that i'm gaining weight. Either way its not good.

Sigh. 58days till promos.

I'm only signing into facebook once every 2days now. If you know me its a GREAT feat. Considering the fact that i camp on facebook 24/7. I feel damn exhausted. And empty.

There doesnt seem to be a reason to go through this year properly. All i do everyday is just: wake up, brush teeth, jump into my clothes, attempt to comb my hair, grab breakfast, take the train, stone on the train with my ipod, and trudge up the hill to school, stone in lecture halls trying to absorb as much as possible and then walk around to tutorials, eat, train, take train home, stone with ipod, study more till 12 and then conk out and its another brand new (sucky) day. You'll notice there aint much God time in this life of mine recently. I feel empty and aimless

Leaders

2010-08-12T12:23:00.001+08:00

Leaders. Also known as people who do shitty jobs and are the first to blamed if anything goes wrong. A bunch of unappreciated people and are often thought to be bossy and powerhungry. But the truth is, its a bloody tough job and is made worse by people who refuses to cooperate. I think leaders are far more cooperative as compared with people who never really had a proper shot at being a leader. Being a leader makes you appreciative of other leaders. It makes you wanna cooperate with them and not make life difficult. Sure you can have a voice and your own opinion but dont go all out to give others a hard time. Being up there and leading aint easy. When you have gone thru it, you'll understand. Its like having the whole world looking at you, waiting for you to say something clever and basically lead them, motivate them and be their source of inspiration. And when you dont, the world blames you. Kick sand in your eyes, wanting to bring you down and its one of the worst kind of job/role ever. These "side effects" of being a leader often turns people off or drives them to the other path- using force to control. Agressive type of leadership often ends up with everyone frustrated and pissed. seen it all too many times.

In my opinion, i think the kind of leadership we should all adopt is of a servant leadership type. Its like how a leader should not only lead but serve at the same time. Easier said than done right? So the key (according to my experience) is to have a good relationship between the team. If everyone is bonded and stuff, will the group then be able to voice out opinions without getting offended and not keep things to themselves. Also with a good relationship will then everyone feel like they have a part to play and etc. Leaders should help and not be helped. non leaders should cooperate and not wait to be cooperated with.

Argh. I just forgot what i wanted to write.

Anyway, newly elected leaders/ classcoms WORK HARD GUYS AND I REALLY APPRECIATE WHAT YOU GUYS DO.

this feels weird. Im part of the class comm and heh im asking myself to work hard. But bah, we are all just gna have fun and thats the most important thing. Well, to me.

Tuition

2010-08-07T17:12:00.001+08:00

Righto. Today marks the day as my first group tuition in many years. AND I FEEL SO INTIMIDATED! Im going there in approx 1hours time and gah!!! What if people there are unfriendly?! I WILL DIE. :( eeps. Im feeeling all freaked out.

Anyway, ystd was nyjc national celebrations and i feel as if ive wasted my time there. Playing games unrelated to national day. At least going out with some of the newyork girls made the day much better. So 1016 got into the semifinals in human foosball. Our greatest achievement so far. HAH. And newyork newyork with newyork girls was good. Plus shaved ice cream thingy really hit the spot. :) so shuting left early followed by serene tsk the two scandalous people. And that left me with baozhen,peien,charmaine. And we wandered around aimlessly and even chatted and joked about food in cold storage.

I PROMISE TO BAKE NICE STUFF ASAP WHEN EXAMS ARE OVER K? Im gna attempt to make heavenly choco/fudge cake like amanda's. All hail amanda the chococakefudge goddess. :)

List 2

2010-08-03T10:09:00.001+08:00

Hi ive made another list :)

TOP 10 THINGS I STRUGGLE WITH

1) my big fat inflated ego. Yes im a highly egoistical person, brimming with too high an amount of confidence that sometimes make me too proud to admit my mistakes and take/ accept others' opinions. ( im doing this note to like visualize/ see a clearer pic of myself. Aka for self discovery thingy. Oh whatever im bored so im doing a little experiment) ah yes, back to my ego. As i was saying, big ego= no good as people think you are constantly bragging and it aint good.

2) nail biting. Its unhygenic period. But ive been doing it for as long as i can remember. It has got to stop. Its gross. To others.

3) procrastination/ lazyness. They go hand in hand actually. I procrastinate cos i cant be arsed to do anything. So i leave everything to the hands of Tomorrow. That roughly equates to many undone tasks. UNPRODUCTIVE AND UNEFFICIENT ABY!

4)greed. For food. Im a big glutton. Anything fattening/ covered in melted cheese is automactically my best friend. And i cannot control my impulses. I MUST HAVE CHEESY FOOD. ITS MY ACHILLES HEEL. PUT A DISH LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF ME AND I'LL GO WEAK IN THE KNEES. Its better than a hot guy. So yes im greedy.

5) melodramatic. I like to blow things up and male it seem like its oh so dramatic. But i mostly try to make a joke outta it. Look at my tweets and you should know.

6) commitments. I have commitment issues. Seriously.

7) i'm highly indecisive. And i know i pissed many people off with my indecisiveness. I cant help it! I want the best of both worlds. Or in many case best of all the worlds.

8) i spend money like nobody's business. On sb/ shoes especially.

9) christianity. Time allocation.

10) ambitions. Too many is not good.

1993

2010-08-01T17:32:00.001+08:00

In 1993, the world was a different place.

There was no Google yet. Or Yahoo. Or Blankanvas.bypatlaw, for that matter.

In 1993, the year of your birth, the top selling movie was Jurassic Park. People buying the popcorn in the cinema lobby had glazing eyes when looking at the poster.

People were indeed watching movies in the cinema, and not downloading them online. Imagine the packed seats, the laughter, the excitement, the novelty.

Do you know who won the Oscars that year? The academy award for the best movie went to Schindler's List. The Oscar for best foreign movie that year went to Belle Époque. The top actor was Tom Hanks for his role as Andrew Beckett in Philadelphia. The top actress was Holly Hunter for her role as Ada McGrath in The Piano. The best director? Steven Spielberg for Schindler's List.

In the year 1993, the time when you arrived on this planet, books were still popularly read on paper, not on digital devices. Trees were felled to get the word out. The number one US bestseller of the time was The Bridges of Madison County by Robert James Waller. Oh, that's many years ago. Have you read that book? Have you heard of it? Look at the cover!

In 1993... The European Community eliminates trade barriers and creates a European single market. EuroNews is launched in Europe. Douglas Hurd is the first high-ranking British official to visit Argentina since the Falklands War. Salvatore Riina, the Mafia boss known as 'The Beast', is arrested in Palermo, Sicily after 23 years as a fugitive. Janet Reno is selected by President Clinton as Attorney General of the United States. Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms agents raid the Branch Davidian compound in Waco, Texas, with a warrant to arrest leader David Koresh on federal firearms violations. Id Software releases Doom, a seminal first-person shooter that uses advanced 3D graphics for computer games. Jiang Zemin becomes President of the People's Republic of China. A nuclear accident occurs at Tomsk 7 in Russia. Laurence Powell and Stacey Koon are found guilty in the second Rodney King trial. Eritrea and Monaco gain entry to the United Nations. U.S. President Bill Clinton orders a cruise missile attack on Iraqi intelligence headquarters in the Al-Mansur District of Baghdad, in response to the attempted assassination of former U.S. President George H. W. Bush during his visit to Kuwait in mid-April. The Campaign for Homosexual Law Reform succeeds in having the Irish sodomy law reformed. Canadian software specialist Peter de Jager publishes in Computerworld U.S. weekly magazine an article Doomsday 2000, which is the first known reference to Y2K, the 2000 Year problem. The video game of the day was Virtua Fighter.

That was the world you were born into. Since then, you and others have changed it.

The Nobel prize for Literature that year went to Toni Morrison. The Nobel Peace prize went to Nelson Mandela and Frederik Willem de Klerk. The Nobel prize for physics went to Russell Alan Hulse and Joseph Hooton Taylor, Jr. from the United States for the discovery of a new type of pulsar, a discovery that has opened up new possibilities for the study of gravitation. The sensation this created was big. But it didn't stop the planets from spinning, on and on, year by year. Years in which you would grow bigger, older, smarter, and, if you were lucky, sometimes wiser. Years in which you also lost some things. Possessions got misplaced. Memories faded. Friends parted ways. The best friends, you tried to hold on. This is what counts in life, isn't it?

The 1990s were indeed a special decade. The Nineties saw the beginnings of the World Wide Web, originating at CERN. Email becomes popular. The Soviet Union dissolved. Living standards in East Asia and Europe generally improved. The Cold War ends. Iraqi forces invade Kuwait. A UN coalition force led by the US was sent to the Persian Gulf, and aerial bombing of Iraq began. The Kosovo War took place. The Ethiopian Civil War ends. Dolly, a sheep, is cloned. The Global Positioning System GPS becomes fully operational. Genetically engineered crops are developed for commercial use. Intel develops the Pentium processor. The Java programming language is created. Microsoft released Windows 95. In Los Angeles, riots occur after the police brutality case involving Rodney King. Great Britain hands sovereignty of Hong Kong to China. East Timor breaks away from Indonesian control. US president Bill Clinton was involved in the Lewinsky scandal. Dogme 95 becomes an important artistic movement in European film. Teen soap Beverly Hills 90210 has its long run. Baywatch becomes the most watched show in history. On MTV, reality television makes its beginning. Nelson Mandela is elected president of South Africa. Germany was reunified. The prediction of computer bug Y2K spreads fear.

Do you know what was on the cover of Life that year?

There's a kid outside, shouting, playing. It doesn't care about time. It doesn't know about time. It shouts and it plays and thinks time is forever. You were once that kid.

When you were 9, the movie Return to Never Land was playing. When you were 8, there was Cats and Dogs. When you were 7, there was a Disney movie out called Atlantis: The Lost Empire. Does this ring a bell?

6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... it's 1993. There's TV noise coming from the second floor. Someone turned up the volume way too high. The sun is burning from above. These were different times. The show playing on TV is Walker, Texas Ranger. The sun goes down. Someone switches channels. There's Beavis and Butt-Head on now. That's the world you were born in.

Progress, year after year. Do you wonder where the world is heading towards? The technology available today would have blown your mind in 1993. Do you know what was invented in the year you were born? The Global Positioning System. The Blue LED.

Is it June or late September?
Is it 1993?
Could you help me to remember?
Is this how I'm supposed to be?
...

That's from the song Cigarettes by King's X.

In 1993, a new character entered the world of comic books: Hellboy. Bang! Boom! But that's just fiction, right? In the real world, in 1993, Kasumi Ishikawa was born. And Jennifer Stone. Parimarjan Negi, too. And you, of course. Everyone an individual. Everyone special. Everyone taking a different path through life.
It's 2010.

The world is a different place.

What path have you taken?

time how fickle

2010-08-01T17:29:00.001+08:00

There's a kid outside, shouting, playing. It doesn't care about time. It doesn't know about time. It shouts and it plays and thinks time is forever. You were once that kid.

teehee

2010-08-01T17:02:00.000+08:00

All about 'Abigail Kwek'...

Top 5 Facts for this Name:

45% of the letters are vowels. Of one million first and last names we looked at, 11.2% have a higher vowel make-up. This means it is very well envoweled.
In ASCII binary it is... 01000001 01100010 01101001 01100111 01100001 01101001 01101100 00100000 01001011 01110111 01100101 01101011
Backwards, it is Liagiba Kewk... nice ring to it, huh?
In Pig Latin, it is Abigailway Ekkway.
People with this first name are probably: Female. So, they are constantly overcharged for beauty products.

Name Origin and Meaning:

Forename:
Origin: Hebrew
Meaning: A Father's Joy

3 Things You Didn't Know (because they're fiction):

Your personal power animal is the Short-Beaked Echidna
Your 'Numerology' number is 1. If it wasn't bulls**t, it would mean that you are ambitious, independent, and self-sufficient. Although you are generally happy, loving, dynamic and charismatic, you can sometimes be egotistical, selfish and melodramatic.
According to the US Census Bureau°, 0.025% of US residents have the first name 'Abigail' and fewer than 0.001% have the surname 'Kwek'. The US has around 300 million residents, so we guesstimate there is only 1 American who goes by the name Abigail Kwek

fun

2010-08-01T16:44:00.003+08:00

PW can be fun.. sometimes.
when you have mad friends like mine

Happiness?

2010-07-31T23:16:00.001+08:00

I need happiness.

Went to universal studios today with mother and it was amazingly fun HAHAH COS MOMI RODE ALL THE RIDES WITH ME. Chicken mother rode the scary mummy ride with me 3 times and CLOSED HER EYES EVERTIME. And the picture snap shot thing was super ugly. I looked like some frightened rabbit.

AND I SAW MELLLLL :D it was so unexpected! But i had oodles of fun with mother and being all touristy :) and hot guy spotting

AND I FOUND MY STREET SOCCER SHOES. IT WAS BURIED UNDER SOME TENT THINGY IN THE STORE ROOM.

Ive got a zillion work to do :( but i shall procrastinate so.. TOMORROW I'LL PIAH.

weeping

2010-07-30T22:00:00.003+08:00

i feel like crying. but whatever.
i think i should write a book on my life and all the funny epic moments.
:( i feel so un-cheery. today is definitely one of my down-est day in this whole entire year.
i can't believe you actually said those things. where's is the person i know so well? i keep trying and you just look pissed all the time. i'm like unearthing every single spare moment from my studying to chat and gossip with you just hoping to get some response and do you know it's so demoralizing when you don't say anything and just ignore me. even a grunt from you makes me feel happy. i don't even think we speak more than 10 sentences a day now. i know we are all busy but can't you at least try for heaven's sake and not blame everyone for not understanding you. communication= understanding geddit? it's not i'm trying to suck up or whatsoever. but i'm merely trying to patch up the gaps in communication in this family and it's working for everyone but you. i want to go back to those days when we could just lie on the bed and chat for hours until mother comes in and nags at us saing that how come we never run out of things to say. but now i look at you, i really don't know what to say. it's like we are two strangers living in the same house where all we have in common is pocketmoney and sleeping in the same room. i want to go back to those days when we would turn to each other when we have troubles and then solve them together and face adversity together. but now we just keep to ourselves and very much rather confide in our friends than each other, knowing that friends can let us down but we still do it anyway. If i'd known that JC sucks up so much of my family time, i'd very much rather not go there at all. for me family is first then everything else comes second. i don't know bout you but the old person i know would have the same answer.

lohm

2010-07-30T21:26:00.002+08:00

love me or hate me it's your choice. all i know revenge is sweet.
like how you get your satisfaction from seeing me all pissed and annoyed. it's for your own good. stop abusing everyone and take a look at yourself okay? seriously, you are what you think you are.
so stop being such a grumbler and start being responsible if you want to be treated like an adult. life is unfair. period. you've gotta prove your worth.

You get over it.

2010-07-26T22:19:00.001+08:00

You'll get over it. Seriously. You are just going thru a phase in life and i have to say it's a rather confusing/ emotional rebellion i guess. Ive been through it and now when i think back and all i can see is that i was naive and so utterly full of myself. You may now see the world as a place you've gotta get out of. It may seem like the world is getting in your way and everybody is trying to pick on you and everybody's just an arse hole who doesnt understand you. But if you will only step out and remove your head from that hole will you then see that actually everyone's trying to help you and get your feet back on the ground. The most important thing is being grounded. Sure the world may promise a thousand and one marvellous things but what value are they of when people you love/loved are not there with you to share the view? You can argue and say well i dont need you guys to be here for me to enjoy, and i want to be free. But seriously, who is truly free? Hm?

You say i want to be this, this and this and claim that we dont care when we point out the flaws in your dreams/ ambitions, but you do know that we point them out because you mean something to us and not that we want to hurt you. You must know that I will support whatever decision you make and im sure our parents will too. I know their words of advice always sound harsh and unpleasant to the ears but look beyond the surface and you'll see their intentions are good and genuine. They never wanted to hurt us. Do you get it. So go cry and sulk for a day and the suck it up and do better. Do them proud and not make them worry. Thats the best way to stop them nagging. They put so much trust in us and the least we can do is be responsible.

So while i study hard and be the first kwek to enter university, you work hard in making sure their most beloved daughter won't bring them worry all the time and of course do well in your studies. Can we work hard to make them the proudest parents?

I love em so cute

2010-07-25T22:38:00.001+08:00

I do miss new york alot.

mcfly

2010-07-25T17:24:00.002+08:00

falling in love with mcfly all over again. can't wait for their new album to be out seriously.

one of my favs of all time

breakk

2010-07-24T15:02:00.002+08:00

phew. just took a break from econs. so right i've came up with a list, a one of a kind list and definitely a first for me. so drumrolls please*

TOP 10 GIRLY THINGS I DO.
1. I scream at all sorts of flying insects. especially bees.
2. I like painting my TOE nails. because i bite my fingernails so i don't really like painting them
3. I like cooking and baking alot.
4. I sew pretty well and i LOVE doing cross stitch. but i always lose interest halfway and i start on another design instead. so often i'm left with many undone/ half done cross stitch sets.
5. i love cuddly cute animals. soft fluffy squishable ones all furry and tiny and makes you go OOOHHH.
6. I like wearing a scent. flowery/ fruity scents. aka perfume.
7. I swoon over cute men in magazines but i have never actually tried stalking someone. hmm. this ought to go on my to do list with dione seah.
8. i cry like a girl. HAHAHA i'm running out of ideas.
9. i like girly romance novels. HAHAHA
10. I talk to my stuffed animals sometimes. ( i think that is considered girly)
10.1 (incase 10 doesnt count) i'm scared of scary movies and i prefer movies with happy endings

this is to prove to a certain someone that i am in fact a very girly person. HAH.

ok like two sides of a coin, there is the NON girly side as well.

TOP 10 NON GIRLY THINGS I DO. according to people
1. i play football/soccer. apparently many people consider that as NOT girly. :(
2. i wear jeans/pants alot. ( because i don't like being all revealing and stuff. i find wearing shorts very sloppy and dresses on a windy day= zhaogeng. and you need to have a nice tan to wear them. which i don't)
3. I like cars. and i know a fair bit bout them.
4. I eat faster than a guy. (now this is just unfair. its a TALENT!)
5. I hate pink ( now they are just stereotyping)
6. i like watching football/soccer and sports stuff (DUH. then watch what? hanah montanah? )
7.i wear teeshirts. sometimes baggy sometimes not.
8. i don't laugh like a girl as said by Dan ( BUT I DO! i just laugh louder and more unabashedly)
9. i'm into extreme sports
10. i like to get myself dirty(?!) by arista

-----------------------------------------------

so yesterday BZ, shooting. chermaine and I went to eat the greatest tiny little thing ever. XIAOLONG BAOS. and my gosh i missed them new york people and i think i enjoyed the company more than the food HAHA.
so we were all our usual self, baozhen being all momo-ish and bullyingme , shooting being retarded and momo-ish, chermaine being the most innocent one. it was a great day yesterday, cos FIRE DRILL = TIME TO CHAT WITH MEL. whatever that spews out from mel's mouth is funny period. be it words, phrases, ideas, food its all funny.

sigh. i really have no mood to study econs. but on the brightside MUMMSY AND DADDSY ARE COMING HOME ON MON!!! AND THEY BOUGHT ME NEW BOOTS THAT I WANTED! :D

thanks be to god

2010-07-22T18:30:00.002+08:00

i think i'm too conceited. even though my results aren't really what i wanted but thanks be to God seriously. i could have done far worse. given that i only had 2weeks to study for it.
anyway went for mel's partay last week and it was A BLAST
and we always ALWAYS MAKE HER CRY ON HER BIRTHDAY. so saw all me lovelies aka AMANDA SERA CHLOE DIONE and ISOMEERR.
missed them soooo much.
pics are up on fb and the helium vid as well! :D
SUCKED SO MUCH HELIUM TILL I HAD A SORE THROAT.

resultsss

2010-07-21T21:08:00.002+08:00

so the crappy results go like this.
GP: E
CHI: U
MATH: U :(
CHEM: U
ECONS: S (or E)
GEOG: D

so. yeppp. i'm hoping my econs after moderation will = E :)
THEN I WILL BE A HAPPY GIRL.

cca UPDATES: smu match in aug prolly :/
AND WE ARE GOING PROFESSIONAL! well..kinda. we are getting cool stuffs like team rain jacket, bag and shorts! ADDIDAS :D
i feel so eggcited HAHAHA
sigh. back to doing more econs.

WHOOPEE DOOPSY

2010-07-16T16:10:00.003+08:00

WOOOHOOOOOOO I GOT ME FIRST DECENT PASS!!!
D FOR GEOG AHAHHAHAHHAH.
and guess what my physical paper got 33/50! :D:D:D:D:D I"M BEYOND HAPPY. LIKE AFTER THREE Us AND AN E, I FINALLY GOT A D. hey that rhymes.
THANK GOD LIKE SERIOUSLY.
so like what i said on facebook and twitter, if i passed geog, i would draw stuff on my face. aka a harry potter scar.
and so, i did.

this is junhoe aka the person who thought he would get a single digit for geog but ended up getting the same marks as me. SO HE ANYHOW BETTED AND HE GOT DRAWN ALL OVER THE FACE.

i'm hoping for a pass for econs.

sometimes when the world gives you crap you turn to God

2010-07-15T21:08:00.001+08:00

RESULTS SO FAR: Us(aka fail) for- math, chem, chinese.
E- GP :D
i was quite pleased with my gp hahaahah even though it was a really horrible pass but A PASS IS STILL A PASS.
anyway, whoever who marked minjun's paper should seriously be skinned alive, set on fire and then that person ought to be shot!
humph. i was quite annoyed as it kinda reminded me of someone who did something like that as well. i was quite helpless and didnt really know what to do seeing mj so upset and crushed. im really bad at comforting people.

what if i said yes

2010-07-11T21:50:00.001+08:00

what if i said yes? loads of things would have been different i believe. hm. another point to ponder.
ANYWAY, NETHERLANDS VS SPAIN TONIGHT AND IM WITH NETHERLANDSSS. WIN YOU BUNCH OF AWESOME ORANGE PEOPLE. WIN THOSE SPAINIARDS WHO WON MY BELOVED GERMANY. im going to sleep soon and waking up at 230 hahaha
and i hope that tmrs training wont be a killer. cos new coach is coming!! i'll blog bout her and probably take a sneaky shot of her. and i must regain my form siol. ok enough of footy. had church today and it still feels kinda strange to be 'promoted' to TCG. like everyone's older and stuff and they have other more adult like responsibilities that im starting or dont even have yet. and in a way im like the freshman the only one btw and they are nice and all but i just cant help but to notice the differences sometimes. ok, maybe im having the arista oversensitive syndrome. GAH.
ohwell. off to sleep and to think about how to fit in and stuff. hm. NAH. AGAIN NETHERLANDSSSSSS.
ANYONE WHO WEAR ORANGE IS AUTOMATICALLY AWESOME.

love ingrid m. such an awesome sing/song writer

2010-07-10T16:09:00.000+08:00

Don't delay. Something tells me I gotta go away
Maybe it's the way we always stay, when our hearts have gone

We can't hold us anymore, no we've got to fold
Down to the floor, yes I know it's cold but baby our hearts have gone

Just because, there once was love, don't mean a thing
Don't mean a thing

I gotta see, if I'm filled up when it's only me
It's not your fault but you just can't be here
Now that my heart has gone
Just because, there once was love, don't mean a thing
Don't mean a thing

Everyone is hurting now
And everything is burning down
But I can build back my new town today

Just because, there once was love, don't mean a thing
Don't mean a thing

everybody

2010-07-10T14:35:00.000+08:00

We have fallen down again tonight
In this world it's hard to get it right
Trying to make your heart fit like a glove
What it needs is love, love, love

Everybody, everybody wants to love
Everybody, everybody wants be to loved
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh
Everybody, everybody wants to love
Everybody, everybody wants be to loved
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh

Happy is the heart that still feels pain
Darkness drains and light will come again
Swing open your chest and let it in
Just let the love, love, love begin

Everybody, everybody wants to love
Everybody, everybody wants be to loved
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh
Everybody, everybody wants to love
Everybody, everybody wants be to loved
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh

Everybody knows the love
Everybody holds the love
Everybody folds for love
Everybody feels the love
Everybody steals the love
Everybody heals with love

Oh oh oh
Just let the love love love begin

Everybody, everybody wants to love
Everybody, everybody wants be to loved
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh
Everybody, everybody wants to love
Everybody, everybody wants be to loved
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh

smu vs nyjc???

2010-07-09T16:06:00.001+08:00

HULALALLA. FIRST FOOTBALL MATCH FOR US NEW NYJC SOCCER GALS. its a maybe still and in the midst of planning cos heh we are quite a bunch of unfit people. so today we were in the field kicking balls and sheetz lah i totally lost my touch after a month of no trainings. after like 30shots my legs became all jelloid and crampish. my right calf is like really tight and weak now. tsk. and i cant curve the ball anymore !! :( and my power is all lacking and stuff. more weight training i suppose. HOHO WE ARE GNA TRY TO SCORE AT LEAST. HEHE. NOT WIN BUT SCORE.
ok i think i nidda sit down. my calf hurts.

failed math

2010-07-08T23:16:00.002+08:00

HI WORLD I GOT MY FIRST U.
ok not really the first since AMATH CAME ALONG
but my first U in jc and i got 19/50 for h1 math
THOUGHT I COULD LIKE CHANGE HISTORY. but shhezh math is still dumb, like me.
anyway went to the gym today and phwoar i've just realised i've got knee fats or smth. tsk. so ran 2.4 and lifted weights trying to train some leg strength and perspired like a PIG. i was quite pleased with my workout cos my belly felt less flabby and i feel more worked out. tsk. after a month of carbo loading.
anyway so went home with cherie yeo and shooting only to end up at cafe cartel stuffing my face full of bread and hotdog and fries. WASTED MY WORK OUT.
was quite annoyed at myself.

and so I HAVE COMPLETED MY FIRST WR DRAFT. I"M MIGHTY PROUD OF MESELF AND ME GROUP MATES. we are ossome.
so germany lost and i had this really horrible first half the day where everything just went wrong.
first germany lost
second i got a U
thirdly my phone crashed on me
fourth my gym plans were disrupted.
but thank GOD everything went back to normal except for the frist two point.
more lessons tmr D:

PW MADNESS

2010-07-06T14:13:00.002+08:00

PW IS MAKING A MISERABLE KID. here i am stuck at school till 5plus cos i have got some weird microsoft word training thingy. :( cos i'm the editor person which translates as: person who will do all the last minute chiongings and staying up with cups of coffee poring over all the research and trying vainly to compile and edit before the deadline.
and guess what?
my group members ditched me. sortof. they all went home thinking that just because we've finished all the work, they are able to escape from the evil clutches of PW. HAHAH but in the end mdm wong called em back. hehe so much for laughing at me staying back for ms workshop.

OKOK enough of being evil. so currently i'm trying to look busy by pretending to do my research and stuff but i'm actually blogging and listening to lady antebellum. AWESOME BAND. not that great as mcfly though. AND WE WENT THRU OUR MATH PAPERS WITHOUT OUR PAPERS. ridiculous right!? sheesh. i think i may not do so well though. PLEASE GOD, i just want a pass. no U's for me please :(

tsk sometimes i think, why do we even come school. and what good will all these knowledge do for us? sure it guarantees us a job, a rice bowl, a way of surviving this dog eat dog world. but.. then after you get a job, then what's next? slog you life away, enjoy some bits of your life, feel down sometimes and live and exist and then? just die?
there has got to be more to life than these things. and i do know the answer. JESUS. GOD. HIM. they should be the things that our lives revolve aruond. not cars, fame, power, money, lovers and etc. seriously think, these things are of no worth when you die and at the end of the day, you attain them, you don't get the joy that you kinda wanted. LDMU. law of diminishing marginal utility. tsk. i want something real, something that lasts and that gives me a sense of purpose. not fickle, worldly things that don't last. HIS LOVE CAN GIVE ME ALL I WANT AND ALL I EVER NEEDED. it's a complicated feeling.

ok my members are here. GTG! :/

alone yet again

2010-07-05T11:56:00.001+08:00

hi im alone yet again.
because my friends are L.A.T.E.
they are so late that i can leave my house at the MEETING TIME AT 1130 and yet be able to sit at starbucks in citihall sipping my greentea cream and be the earliest. AGAIN.
there is nothing that annoys me more than my mother's pms: that is being absurdly late.
seriously, what's with all the teens nowadays. being late is not cool. it shows a lack of responsibility and poor time management or that you cant be bothered with keeping promises and etc.
sheesh.
sorry im in foul mood today. parents ruined my day yesterday and i have been seething ever since.
ohwell ISOMER OUTING LATERRRRRRRR. HOMG EXCITED TTM.

its over! for now

2010-07-04T16:22:00.002+08:00

ITS OVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
MY FIRST MAJOR EXAM IN NYJC IS OFFICIALLY OVER! SO GOODBYE NOTES AND ANNOYING TEXTBOOKS. MAKE WAY FOR MY VERY SHORT HOLIDAY PLANS!
so i'm going ubin with shooting and junhoe and then a movie with min
it's gna be epic. i can feeel it.
so anyway, today was youth sunday and arista and i had a role to play in it. surprise surprise!
we were suppose to act as bullies and stuff. and i tell you i was like omg-ing inside myself and having a giggling fit. you guys know i can never keep a straight face and such. i think it's somesort of a disease. hm.
and so we got some feedback that apparently, arista was so into her act that she actually looked FIERCE AND MEAN. which i say is her inner arista. :P
and i didnt go for my new york meet up. cos i had rehersals which started REALLY LATE and made me cab down for nothing. and arista ditched me halfway. SO I HAD TO EAT DINNER ALONE and TRAVEL HOME ALONE. IN THE RAIN. ALONE i repeat. ALONE.
there is nothing i hate more that eating dinner alone. it just.. seems.. very tragic i suppose. and lonely and feel very unwanted and stuff. oh in case you do not know, i'm terribly frightened to be alone. like there's this inner fear of how people will judge you when you are seen as being a loner or loser or misfit of sorts. ive been trying to embrace the beauty in being alone which is quite.. enlightening and very strange and difficult.

enlightened in a sense that sometimes people don't even give a damn about you actually and they don't really even spot/notice you in the first place or you are just merely glanced over. it kinda made me think and recheck my ego which is damn big btw. and my pride and with me thinking that i'm oh so noticable and stuff. hmm. strange and difficult in a sense that being alone gets your brain (i think its only mine) whirling and reflecting about the stuff you did in the day and you get to stone meaningfully. i mean, it's like a little world for you just for awhile to think and ponder and perhaps even learn from the little teeny weeny stuff you did in the day and maybe improve yourself. and for me, admitting my mistakes is something that takes ALOT ALOT of courage and guts to do. i've never been good with like apologising or admitting my mistakes so i tend to just leave it as that, hoping that sometimes things may work out. sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. and i'll go thinking; DARN IT. why did i just leave it as that? if i had done blah blah things could have been blah blah. tsk. the inner indecisive me.
i hadn't started this post with degrading myself in mind... but i kinda got carried away.

homophobic

2010-07-01T08:50:00.001+08:00

i dont think i can ever talk to you the way i did last time.
now that i kinda suspect something.
anyway. UBIN TRIP ON MONDAY WITH MY HANG GANG. and then hopefully a movie date with isomer and perhaps dinner as well.
IM SOUPER EGGCITED.
AND AND I MIGHT BE MEETING 4e2 FOR SUPPER!! IM GONNA GET READY ALLLLL MY BLONDE JOKES AND MAKE THEM LAUGH TILL THEY ARE ROLLING ABOUT. yes i shall and i will.
chem mye today and i feel so discouraged and dumb. sometimes you try and struggle so hard only to have reality smash you back to earth.

mr ng we miss you

2010-06-29T10:51:00.001+08:00

so im gonna sit for my math exam in just bout 3hours time. and im getting this weird churny feeling. the same exact feeling before every single amath test. i miss you mr ng. i want you to nag at me before every single test: watch your signs ah! write neater can? your presentation better not be all over the place.
today im gonna try and do you proud. by doing well for math.

hypnotised

2010-06-26T16:21:00.001+08:00

i can't get you off my mind and that's when i realised, you've had me hypnotised.

things im gonna do after the myes

2010-06-25T16:31:00.001+08:00

hi im currently in sb @marina square with JAIHOE aka birthday boy. anyway, ive got my post mid year exam plan all sorted out.
straight away after my last exam, im gonna go out for a feast. to soothe my troubled soul that is very much convinced that i'll fail myes,
second, go for an outing with my new york homies
thirdly, go on a photography trip with dad and take nice pictures.
fourthly, outing with beavers i hope
fifth, PLAY MY NEW PS2 game
and then ive gotta study for more up coming tests. how terribly sad.
i think i better stop blogging, chem bonding is calling!

oh my mid years

2010-06-17T08:59:00.002+08:00

shut up brain. stop reminding me that my exams are coming and i've barely started on anything.
sigh. i dream of going back NY everyday and just have a hell of a time with my homies. and all we do is but sightseeing, eat, sleep, laugh, attack each other and taking loads of pictures.
ok i need to finish econs by today then i can start on my geog and chem!
saw them beavers yesterday and I MISS THEM SO MUCH. with a spazzy min in one corner, a brenda attacking everything in sight, a skinny don leaning on everything and a tiny sleepy mel snoozing/eating in another corner.

miss my roomies as well. ALL THE GLORIOUS 10NIGHTS OF FUN/ATTACK SESSIONS/PILLOWFIGHTS/ family guy/daidi/gossip. miss it ttm.

my roomies

i miss NEW YORK

i love NY

2010-06-13T17:25:00.001+08:00

I TOTALLY TAKE BACK WHAT I JUST SAID IN THE PREVIOUS POST.
the ny people are such a bunch of delightful people minus one person of course.
MADE SOME REALLY AWESOME FRIENDS AKA BAOZHEN AND CASSANDRA my roomies. will elaborate more about the trip soon!
firstly, i nidda get over my jetlag and focus on my revision.

oh i've got an EC! ;)

FAREWELL OGRE.

2010-05-29T15:44:00.002+08:00

SO LONG FAREWELL!
GOOD BYE TEMASEK.
oh dear. i think my luggage is overweight from all the little biscuits i packed in haha
BUT HEY! you never know when you're gna need em'!
and GAH i went to snip my medusa look alike hair and ended up looking even more out of place, if that's even possible.
and wedding dinner tonight @ some weird hotel. seriously, i'm not even spared. sigh, now i'll have to do the world's fastest changing act in the hotel where i'll have to whisk my dress ( yes i'll be wearing a dress) and jump into my new york outfit aka ugly lime green polo tee with jeans and red sneakers. i think i look like walking traffic light

i'll miss you guys. a lot.
and my mommy just said something really sappy but kinda sweet.
mum: i better not send you all the way to the airplane gate (she can cos she is a staff)
me: WHY?
mum: don't want. later i'll cry.

i do love my ma. minus her pms and her menopausal days.

i'll try to BLOG FROM THE STATES! :D
provided i don't get mugged at some lan shop.
see you on the other side guys :D

my very own boots

2010-05-28T22:43:00.000+08:00

my very own self created boots HAHAH

dear santa

2010-05-28T22:15:00.004+08:00

here's an early christmas list:
dear santa: i have been a really good girl recently. minus all the cheeky pranks i pulled in school and the occasional munching of food in class, i have indeed been the role model for all little girls. i think. so there for pretty please can i have this for christmas this year?
thanks
xoxoxo

ps: i like the yellow one the best.

it
helps that wayne rooney aka my idol endorses them :D

soccer girls!

2010-05-28T13:17:00.004+08:00

'

SOCCER PEOPLE

ADIOS

2010-05-28T11:31:00.002+08:00

FAREWELL! (read as FAR-EE-WELL)
just one more day before i head over to the united states
sigh. i kinda miss singapore already.
BUT I'LL MISS YOU GUYS MORE! and of course twitter and facebook

anyway i'm kinda bummed that i'll be missing my bday celebration with the gang and all my friends who will be here in spore. and i bet the newyork people will be quite cold and stuff. i don't know any of them. except some acquaintances. :(
ohwell. THANK YOU CHERIE YEO! FOR YOUR LOVELY BDAY PREZZIE! :))
and oh soccer outing with the girls was FABULOUS. we chatted and became all spazzy, camwhored, bought team stuff and had fun in general.
OH DEAR. i've just realised my luggage is bout 70%full and arghh so little shopping time!

and my flight is like at 230 am!!! another morning flight. and i'll have to be at t3 at the quatar counter at 1130. sheesh. not to mention i have to attend some annoying wedding dinner of my cousin's just before my trip. great.

oh if you guys wanna contact me, just send me an sms. i won't reply but make sure you phrase your questions or sms in a yes or no context.
so if i mean yes, i'll miss call you once. if i mean no, i miss call you twice! and if i don't know, i'll miss call you three times! ISN"T THAT PURE GENIOUSITY?
eg: X asks: have you eaten?
me: miss call once= yes.

so that way, you guys will be able to save money.
assuming that you guys want to know how i'm doing.

photos me madomoselle

2010-05-23T17:00:00.005+08:00

this blog needs some scenery aka pictures.
so pics form yesterday's CONCERT!
MEL WAS EPIC and of course cute in her cup dress and i don't know why but i felt so damn proud of her. prolly because her momma was sitting behind me and she knows i'm one of mel's beaver friends. and i sniffed at the flower and inhaled some pollen and spent the whole entire cab ride choking and coughing.
BUT YES SHE IS AN OSSOME POSSUM.

vivian was totally CUTE! TTM. at first we were all like eh where's vivian?! and we all cheered like mad women when she appeared on stage. and glad you liked the flower!

so pics as promised

cheryl lee and shooting

cheryl's love gift to cherieyeo

concert gals!

i think this is sop 1!

spot mel!

them cute forks and spoons

me, my fellow paparazzi, cheng, and show

ISOMERRS

me and da boss

mel's legion of female supporters.

choir B&B

2010-05-22T12:49:00.003+08:00

ALOHA. just back from the ever painless training!
anyway, this week has been a hell like week with crazy tests with ridiculous questions and not to mention ridiculously little marks for a whole load of written crap
AND I CONFIRM DOUBLE CHOP AM GONNA FAIL ECONS.
i totally didn't give any examples and i was stoning and my ever useless brain just whirled and tried to come up with the answers but to no avail.

BUT WHATEVERR. THE WEEK IS OVER AND TODAY IS CHOIR CONCERT DAY! AKA SEEING MEL IN A CUP DRESS. AND VIVIEN AS A SPOON/FORK. hehe i can't wait to see all me lovely friends in their cute costumes.
i would want to be... A FEATHER DUSTER.
then i can sweep all the dust and not to mention bad comments about the show.

ARGH. GOTTA GO NOW. MY RABBIT POO TRAY NEEDS TO BE CHANGED.

orc

2010-05-19T14:20:00.000+08:00

On a hill far away stood an old rugged cross,
 the emblem of suffering and shame;
 and I love that old cross where the dearest and best
 for a world of lost sinners was slain.

 So I'll cherish the old rugged cross,
 till my trophies at last I lay down;
 I will cling to the old rugged cross,
 and exchange it some day for a crown.

O that old rugged cross, so despised by the world,
 has a wondrous attraction for me;
 for the dear Lamb of God left his glory above
 to bear it to dark Calvary.
 (Refrain)

In that old rugged cross, stained with blood so divine,
 a wondrous beauty I see,
 for 'twas on that old cross Jesus suffered and died,
 to pardon and sanctify me.
 (Refrain)

To that old rugged cross I will ever be true,
 its shame and reproach gladly bear;
 then he'll call me some day to my home far away,
 where his glory forever I'll share.



love this old hymn.

go ahead, cry me a river

2010-05-17T22:26:00.000+08:00

go ahead, cry me a river.
i'm glad you've stopped trying.

depressed cheese

2010-05-17T22:01:00.002+08:00

my soccer coach said that we are supposed to be on a pre competition diet.
which translates as A WHOLE MONTH WITHOUT CARBO/CHEESE/POTATO/MAYO/FASTFOOD/ FRIED FOOD. somebody please, shoot me. i think i can do everything except the cheese part. I LIVE FOR CHEESE. without it, i am nothing. NOTHING. even soccer balls will start looking like a wholesome lovely parmesan cheese in maturity which equals HEAVEN. and mud on my boots will look like flakes of blue cheese. MMMMM..
OMG I MUST STOP ALL THESE NONSENSE. heh, i'm quite eggcited for soccer outing. i don't mind PRAWNING. :X

anyway todays chem test was kinda weird. ALL THAT I STUDIED FOR DIDNT COME OUT. I FEEL SO SHORTCHANGED. WTH. if only someone told me there were 20 mcq, i would have just brought a dice.
so sat beside cheryl and we kinda compared answers at the end :X

so lessons were terribly boring cos my tummy was growling the whole time. and i've just realised, i only ate one meal in the whole entire day. NO DINNER AND TEA. one step closer to my "soccer diet"

TSK.

oh jamie told me I PASSED ME CHEM TEST! PRAISE THE LORD! the whole time i was praying and reading bible verses for self confidence and thank you LORD SO MUCH. in Him i trust, His LOVE ENDURES FOREVER!
oh man. we are playing against MI this wed! i'm kinda eggcited.
correction, VERY VERY HYPED UP!

ok back to econs :(

i hate you

2010-05-15T23:30:00.003+08:00

I thought PI was bad enough, but GPP... SUCKS MY ENTIRE LIFE AND DESTROYS ALL MY FREE TIME.

rather harsh don't you think? BUT I HAD TO RANT. IF NOT I'LL LOSE MY SANITY. not like it isn't lost and thrown into the black holes of the universe. JC is driving me round the bend. i feel like i'm mugging for mid years instead of common tests. i take one look at arista's mugging schedule that's supposedly "busy" and i look at mine. there's no missing the stark contrast. SHE ONLY HAS 4CHPTS FOR CHEM MYE AND I HAVE 5 FOR MY COMMON TEST! WHAT SORT OF UNFAIR THEORY IS THIS?!

but then again, why should i complain. no, correction, what RIGHT do i have to complain. i chose this. i wanted this. i got what i deserved. at some point i wanted this. very badly in fact.
i think God has a purpose for me. afterall, how on earth did i get into NYJC with my weird results and got my weird combination approved?? HE HAS A PLAN. i just have to trust it.

crap. it's gonna be 12 and i'm still blogging away. but wait, arista is still in the LOO doing who knows what. GAH. gotta wake up at 8 tmr to prepare and head to the library for a full day of intensive shivering. ah i mean STUDYING. seriously, the LIBRARY is like the north pole but worse. and emily lim is gna be there to stalk her hwa choong eye candy. i've got my bushy eyebrows to keep me entertained.

and I AM NOT STRANGE. AND TO HECK WITH YOU AND YOUR OPINIONS. I'M STICKIN TO MY VALUES.

you said

2010-05-12T22:00:00.001+08:00

why do old wounds when reopened hurt more than new ones?
is it because we forgot what it feels like to bleed?
you said time would heal all wounds.

ohman ohman i wasted like 2 hours downloading taylor swift songs :/

SHE WEAR SHORT SKIRTS, I WEAR TEESHIRTS. :X

OH bother.

2010-05-08T15:10:00.002+08:00

HI! i'm sorry for not updating much recently.
i've been struck down by some horrid illness that left me burning and shivering for four torturous days. :(and thanks for all the well wishes!

ANYWAY. went for the NEW YORK briefing trip and OMG it isn't that glamorous as they made it out to be. bunking= four to a room with only 2beds. lunches and breakfast will usually be something quick ie: fast food and continental style breakfast lunch= sandwiches :(
I'M SO GONNA BRING MY CUP NOODLES FILLED WITH MSG.
and wth so little shopping days. :(
i seriously hope that it will be good. somehow.

SUSHI

2010-05-02T22:44:00.001+08:00

SUSHI/STARBUCKS/STUDYING TMR WITH GCG.
go find out what that means
IT WILL BE VAIR VAIR EGGCITING.
WE WILL LIVE UP TO BEING GIRLS AND CHAT AWAY

pov

2010-05-02T22:38:00.001+08:00

I'm getting tired of asking,
This is the final time,
So did I make you happy?
because you cried an ocean,
When there's a thousand lines,
about the way you smile,
Written in my mind,
But every single word's a lie.

Is this a sign from Heaven,
Showing me the light?
Was this supposed to happen?
I'm better off without you,
So you can leave tonight,
'N don't you dare come back and try to make things right,
'Cause I'll be ready for a fight

I never wanted everything to end this way,
But you can take the bluest sky and turn it grey.
I swore to you that I would do my best to change,
But you said it don't matter,
I'm looking at you from another point of view,
I don't know how the hell I fell in love with you,
I'd never wish for anyone to feel the way I do.

And you said it don't matter.

BABY GALORE

2010-05-01T20:45:00.003+08:00

phew just came back from the baby bash at tanny's house and it's soooooooo heartwarming!
i never knew i liked babies that much. until today. it made me wanna coo and stroke and grin at every little thing they did. i know its so unlike me but, something deep inside me stirred. maybe its maternal instincts. or could be my period is coming and i'm feeling extra emotional. anyway, NAOMI AND HANNAH ARE LIKE THE CUTEST TWINS EVER. i secretly wish they were mine :X
so woke up bright and early and headed down to starbucks for gpp project and i've become pals with the baristas there! WOO :D
they even delivered my bagel! and some angmoh pissed me off. BRATS. can't they even say a simple thank you? URGH.
and so took the train to beeshan and met may on da train! and we went baby gift shopping. and ZOMG. i tell you, babies nowadays are like the luckiest things IN THE WORLD. they have so many eggciting and pretty/cool/innovative baby gadgets and clothes! and met yy,sera and bryan at bhg and i missed all of them so much. even bryan aka pimple boy. SHHH. hopefully sera won't see this! she'll keel me.
and then we walked around trying vainly to pick out the best and prettiest and CHEAPEST gift we could find. HEY. don't laugh at us. its really difficult finding THE PERFECT GIFT. its akin to trying to buy something at cartier with just 10bucks in your pocket.
and so bought 2 cute baby clothing sets and then off we went. idk why but i was SOOO in the mood for photo taking. must be darius' influence. walked the wrong way to her house as usual and YELLED hi to the ex pregnant lady and then ushered ourselves to her house and took full advantage of the aircon. damn. it was SWELTERING. ate some buffet lunch and sat down for some catching up. and i promise you, i won't be a JAMES TAN. i'm gonna be ABIGAIL KWEK. ;) i seriously wonder how we'll all be like in 10years time. how many of us will actually become what we aspire?
so oohed and ahhed at naomi and hannah for a total of 4 hours. seriously, i've never been so FASCINATED by babies. i was a little freaked out by my own behavior. could this be a sign?? i'm getting old and motherly! :(
and I"M TALLER THAN TANNY NOW. TALLER YOU HEAR! :D
maybe parenthood/giving birth have shrunk her.
gosh. i can't stop gushing about the babies.
this need to stop. i can't imagine what i'll become if i do have my own children.

hopeless

2010-05-01T20:37:00.000+08:00

Hopeless
Everybody says its just another decay of the soul
But I know I'm hopeless, thought about anything to take me
Away from this hole in the ground
I found it's hopeless clinging to a feeling
Like a fish on a line, so blinded by the lately
Hopeless, no more saying that there's no more time.

I've was trying far too hard
To be what I thought I should be
I was playing wild cards and
Seeing things that weren't in front of me
Like a little tiger, played far too long,
Until I was hurting myself, again and again

Well I'm just discovering I'm living in a different body
Caught a little insight into everything thats happening to me
Like a little spider, I'm climbing the insurmountable
But I'll never hold myself accountable, no.

'Cause I'm hopeless.
Everybody says I'm hopeless
But I got a bit of hopelessness
Oh and you can never bring me down
Even though I've got some silent ground
Oh because I love it so
And I think you should know

Because I'm hopeless.
Everybody says its just another decay of the soul
But I know I'm hopeless, thought about anything to take me
Away from this hole in the ground
I found it's hopeless clinging to a feeling
Like a fish on a line, so blinded by the lately
Hopeless, hopeless, hopeless
No more saying that there's no more time.

GPP

2010-05-01T10:46:00.000+08:00

ALOHA! IM HERE AT SB DOING MY GPP :)

guess who fell down the deep hole of poop

2010-04-30T22:22:00.002+08:00

I AM FREE. for now.
the weekends are here again and my gosh this whole entire week just flew past me in a blink of an eye. or should i say sleep encrusted eyes. i've been like a holy mugger this entire week with freaky tests like geog and gp in a day and yes gp=loads of useless research that is of not use to you once the test is over. and my PI. OMG. PI. i'll never EVER forget that word. i think this is my.. let me think. 6th draft? and its still NOT OK. and the bloody picture took me forever to draw( 10mins) ok i know its not very long but... i sacrificed my geog mugging for it! PW YOUD BETTER GET AN A OR ELSE.
anyway. GPP tomorrow @starbucks. im trying to spread the goodness of sb to all my pals and then one day, some barista will come up to me and give me a complimentary drink. that is my dream. don't burst my bubble.
and kevin just emailed me his PI. and im turning in already! why is everyone so last minute. >:(
and THE GOSSIP CLUB IS SO EGGCITING. i wanna spam myself with sushi. and become so fat that i can barely move my legs and shoot balls in soccer.
oh yes. tanny ho's baby celebration tmr! im quite eggcited!! TANNY!!! I WANNA SEE WHETHER DID YOU PUT ON WEIGHT LIKE I PREDICTED OR STILL STICK THIN!

XOXO- you know you love me.
*hah, im trying on a little gossip girl tagline here. ok it makes me cringe when i read it. but BAH. today is a FRIDAY and all cheesy/cringing phrases are allowed and in fact, ENCOURAGED! ;)

granted

2010-04-28T21:41:00.002+08:00

i've realised recently, i've been taking things for granted. much too often for my liking. for example maybe my allowance raise and my extension of my curfew. maybe it's a sign that i'm growing up or perhaps my parents are starting to learn how to let go.
my dad just nagged at my sister for the weirdest thing:
d: can you please don't paint your nails blue?
a: why? it's pretty. i like it.
d: can you just wipe it off. its so ugly.
a: no. i think it's pretty. and please don't start the whole blue is a demon colour thing.
d: but you are a child. and children don't paint their nails.its unhealthy.
a: I AM NOT A CHILD ANYMORE. we can't remain as little girls forever! we grow up! and i use a base coat ;P

i don't think i'll ever understand how it feels to be a parent and see your most precious growing up and then moving in a direction of their own. and slowly but surely you will get pushed out of their picture as new responsibilities pile up. i'll prolly wail and beat my chest and beg my children to come back. already i can feel, myself, drifting from my parents my sister as i get increasingly busy and the time constraints just makes things worse. communication breaks down and then it will all be like a domino effect.
i must prioritize.

anyway referring to the earlier conversation between my father and sister, imagine blue nail polish= a boy.
hoho. all hell WILL break loose.
if you know my parents, a NO always means a NO.
there's no changing their minds.
sigh. ok enough gp like blogposts.
BACK TO THE PI DRAWING :(

without you

2010-04-28T17:13:00.003+08:00

supposed to be studying geog but im facebooking and watching youtube vids
I NEED SELF CONTROL! and i nidda get my inner mugger revived and ABSTINENCE FROM STARBUCKS IS A MUST! so cherie yeo, you must pinch me when i say i want to go starbucks

im so gonna put this song and all other songs related to new york on my ipod playlist.
hype myself up.
and btw my trip is exactly two weeks and 3 days long ;)
4 weeks till you know what ;)

it's been two weeks
Three days long
I'm all alone since you've been gone
I can't keep myself from asking why
Just wanna see my reflection
In your eyes

Just know that I'm with you
And what you feel
I feel it too

I'm feeling lately
I'm going crazy
Wondering how I'll go on without you
I keep on trying
Slowly dying
Thinking of how I need you here with me

I wear your shirt
The scent of you
Reminds of the night that we become two
There's nothing else
That feels the same
Everyday there's sun, it feels just like rain

Just know that I'm with you
And what you feel
I feel it too

If you think it's easy for me
Well, you're wrong
Sometimes I'm weak and baby you know
I'm not that strong

You're in New York
And I'm in L.A.
There's so much to tell you
Words I need to say
But your phone keeps ringing

I need you here with me

How will I go on without you?

It's been two weeks
Three days long
I'm all alone since you've been gone

WEEKENDS :(

2010-04-25T18:25:00.001+08:00

i've been facebooking the entire sunday away. :(
i feel so unaccomplished and my geog notes are half done and I WANT TO WATCH SHUTTER ISLAND NOW. i hope it wont be like that scary as shutter :/
anyway had film fest last friday and all i can say only 8th sin is the only one worthy of watching. its bout like how gambling can tear your whole family apart and etc. and LIYAN'S FACE IS LIKE DAMN EPIC CAN. I DOUBLED OVER WITH LAUGHTER.
and i skipped saturday's training :)
SHUTTER ISLAND WITH ARISTA TODAY. i hope i can sneak her in :/

grraawgwag

2010-04-22T22:19:00.002+08:00

i wish i could do what i like. what i want. and what i think best deem fit for myself. you always said : oh it's your decision. but when the time comes for me to make a choice, you always try to psycho me into going your desired path. the path of many open doors to success. i know you mean well. but what's the point if i'm not happy? you always say long term gains are better than short term ones. i agree but to what extent must i sacrifice to achieve this so called success in the future? my social life? my hobbies? my likes? my love life? my dreams? i may be successful in the future but when i look back, will i see a legion of shattered dreams, broken relationships and a sense of unfulfillment? how much is this worldly success worth? i want to do art. i want to be a soccer star. i want to be a cook. i want to be all those things you say aren't worth being. i want to be someone who has lived life to the fullest and not make sacrifices that i know i will regret. i know that God will provide. so why are you worrying so much? leave it all into His hands. things WILL fall into place. mother, i have faith in him, so can i have your FAITH in me?

i need rest asap

2010-04-20T22:09:00.003+08:00

her neck ought to be broken into 24pieces and then her body mown over and crushed by a 1000tonne lorry. she should know who she is. fancy causing a rift and sowing discord. pfft. you'll neva get in the way of us kwekies.
enough of the outburst. anyway.. the most embarrassing thing happened to me today. im gonna become another cheryl lee.
today i walked into some god forsaken cobweb and got myself horribly tangled up. imagine the scene of me waving and thrashing around trying to swipe the invisible cobwebs off my face and looking like a total moron. from my point of view, it was terribly disorientating but for onlookers, i think its like a scene straight out of mr bean or some mime show. as i was saying, i got caught in the cobweb and became blinded momentarily. and so i stumbled around like some crossed eyed pelican/ drunkard and opened up the door to the classroom with gusto. and then i plopped down on the nearest chair and did my best to clear the sticky mess off my face. and i muttered and cursed my ill luck of walking into some confounded web. and then i realised erlin was in the class so i turned around to say hi only to see an unfamiliar bewildered face staring straight at me. the first thought that popped into my brain was: whoa! since when did erlin become so tanned! so i put my glasses back on and got the shock of my life. IT WASNT ERLIN AT ALL! I HAD ENTERED THE WRONG CLASSROOM!!!!! OMG I NEARLY DIED FROM EMBARRASSMENT. i think my face went beetroot red or perhaps a more suitable analogy, AS RED AS A BABOON'S ASS. my gosh. i wanted to shovel and drill a hole till the centre of the earth's core(which is a solid btw) and hide there till i melt and become part of the magma and then rise up as a magma plume and form hotspots. (sorry for the weird geog analogies, you must understand ima geog student) SHEETZZZZ. then i dashed outta the room and wore my glasses properly and double checked the next classroom that i entered. i didnt really tell anyone cos i was really really embarrassed.
note to self: glasses ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT aid for anyone who is myopic. AND GETTING COBWEBS IN YOUR HAIR IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN ENTERING INTO THE WRONG CLASSROOM AND LOOKING LIKE A TOTAL EEJIT.

5weeks till you know what ;)

i need rest asap

2010-04-20T22:09:00.001+08:00

econs is alien

2010-04-19T12:11:00.001+08:00

im stuck in lecture hall 4 and im utterly bored to death. econs INDEED IS A LANGUAGE OF ALIENS. and i think my lecturer looks a little like mr bean from the animated series. HAH. if only he were mr bean/ rowan atkinson then econs will be epic. sigh 6 weeks till you know what.

eggs

2010-04-18T21:17:00.002+08:00

i love chatting online with my quirky friends they are all so cute

SLACKZ

2010-04-18T19:55:00.002+08:00

ok i just officially wasted my weekend away.

lets see shall we?
friday i had soccer training and it was quite alright. rather slack i suppose. and I GOT ME SOCCER KIT PEOPLE! :D
my old boots were like hideously scarred and not to mention dirt encrusted.
so came back from soccer and read some geog notes. and did some chem.
sat: had some cheena translating competition and it was rather entertaining i must admit. BUT DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND ME. I'M NOT A CHINESE GODDESS. i was struggling to understand half of the conversations. and blah blah had tau huei with shooting and then went home to do some econs revision and read a little chem
sun: went to church early cos i was on worship and then discovered my spirtual gifting by filing in this mcq form and such. and i got exhortation, pastor, leadership, faith and evangelism. but i seriously doubted the pastor part. hm. so finished geog tutorial and i'm perfecting my PI. and sheezz i havent started on math revision. damn. test is on tues!
and my econs.. i'm trying to procrastinate as much as possible. sigh. i really must start revising for mid years. the whole darn new york trip is gonna eat up half of my holidays aka studying time. i'm starting to regret a tad bit about the trip. NEVERMIND. I SHALL BE A TRUE NERD AND PACK MY NOTES AND SHIP IT ACROSS THE PACIFIC OCEAN. and yes stuff some in my backpack and to entertain myself throughout the 20 hour flight.
:/ i have this queer feeling that i'll get retained... BUT WITH GOD ON MY SIDE WHO AM I TO FEAR? BRING IT ON MID YEARS. i'll be waiting. I'll ace it. just you wait.

i wanna cry

2010-04-14T18:55:00.002+08:00

ever had this odd pang of regret and bitterness when you think about all the wrong decisions you've ever made and always wondered what would the present look like if you had gone for the other choice? did plenty of that today.
i'm not being all "ËMO" and everything, I"M JUST WONDERING.

dinner is here! hurrah.
6weeks and 3days till you know what

NEWYORK

2010-04-13T21:57:00.005+08:00

ok, believe it or not, I GOT INTO THE NEWYORK FIELDTRIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHICH APPARENTLY 200 AND MORE PEOPLE APPLIED FOR IT AND I WAS THE SELECTED FEW!!!!!!!! ZOMG!
THANK GOD THANK GOD! i was like praying so hard i'll get in.
heh, i've never been to a country out of asia for a field trip. :D and i'll get to see uncle wong keng and his SUPERB OIL PAINTINGS!
and best of all, SEE SHOOTING IS BUNKING WITH MUA~ i hope i don't sleep talk again. :/
anyway, OMGOMG i still can't believe i got in! i mean the chances were so slim! and when i think of the exchange program, i think i may faint from joy. and loads of free time and 12-13glorious days of FREEDOM BABEH.
and MY GOD SHOPPING WILL BE LIKE HEAVEN! MACY'S, BARNEY'S, BLOOMINGDALE'S, TIMES SQUARE, MADISON'S AVENUE AND MORE! and of course, the very place where i'm dying to see is GRAND STATION.

i still can't believe it you know? when i read the message i was like OMG I CAN'T BE THAT BLESSED TO SNAG A PLACE!

PICS OF NEWYORK (im just getting myself hyped up)

and yes, celebrities!

and not to forget hot PEOPLE!

first things first

2010-04-12T21:45:00.002+08:00

First things first, I WANNA GIVE A HUGE HUG TO CHERIE YEO. COME CLAIM THE STARBUCKS FROM ME! well done already! :)

oh and second, MY PI DIDNT GET REJECTED STRAIGHT IN DA FACE! :D i'm like over the moon. the next time i'm gonna go starbucks to study. its so CONDUCIVE :D and i know olivia is secretly jealous of me cos i don't get chased out by them from studying inside.
and ONE MORE THING TO BRAG. i'm so sorry, i just had to! i couldnt brag it in school cause no one understands my long medical injury history. AND YES I'VE BEEN GIVEN THE ALL CLEAR FOR NAPFA AND I GOT A GOLDALICIOUS GOLD! :D and i was uber surprised at my standing broad jump: 183!! i think if i knew how to swing properly, i could prolly reach 190cm and my 2.4~~~
i'm so proud of my 2.4km. after being exempted for a year plus from rigorous exercise and vball trainings, i managed to get a C :D which was 15.08mins. damn. if i didnt stop to tie my hair at the finishing line, i could have gotten a B! :/ and FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE, MY KNEE DIDNT CRAMP UP AND GONE ALL SPAZZY ON ME! WOOHOO! INJURY QUEEN IS OUT OF INJURY LEAVE AND BACK IN ACTION! spankin.
really really have to thank God for everything. he gave me strength ALL DA WAY. i could feel it. i was praying so vigorously that my leg won't go all jelly halfway and my ligaments won't scream and tear.
THANK GOD. :)

love it

2010-04-11T20:05:00.001+08:00

Who says I can’t get stoned?
Turn off the lights and the telephone
Me and my house alone
Who says I can’t get stoned?

Who says I can’t be free?
From all of the things that I used to be
Re-write my history
Who says I can’t be free?

It’s been a long night in New York City
It’s been a long night in Baton Rouge
I don’t remember you looking any better
But then again I don’t remember you

Who says I can’t get stoned?
Call up a girl that I used to know
Fake love for an hour or so
Who says I can’t get stoned?

Who says I can’t take time?
Meet all the girls on the county line
Then wait on fate to send a sign
Who says I can’t take time?

It’s been a long night in New York City
It’s been a long night in Austin too
I don’t remember you looking any better
But then again I don’t remember you

Who says I can’t get stoned?
Plan a trip to Japan alone
Doesn’t matter if I even go
Who says I can’t get stoned?

It’s been a long night in New York City
It’s been a long time since 20 too
I don’t remember you looking any better
But then again I don’t remember you

i lost me voice

2010-04-10T22:23:00.000+08:00

lost me voice